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Have you ever seen a moose or, hell, even a caribou irl?
Yes (moose) 18%  18%  [ 2 ]
No (moose 0%  0%  [ 0 ]
Yes (caribou) 9%  9%  [ 1 ]
No(caribou) 0%  0%  [ 0 ]
Yes (moose and caribou) 9%  9%  [ 1 ]
No (moose and caribou) 36%  36%  [ 4 ]
Undecided 27%  27%  [ 3 ]
Total votes : 11
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 Post subject: Re: Scranton Stranglers Season Log: A players point of view
PostPosted: Mon Jun 09, 2014 10:27 pm 
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Oh shit. The gods have rewarded us.

:P Pumped for a Pablo storyline :D

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 Post subject: Re: Scranton Stranglers Season Log: A players point of view
PostPosted: Mon Jun 09, 2014 11:01 pm 
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I'm still just wondering if Gunner will make a good main character.

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 Post subject: Re: Scranton Stranglers Season Log: A players point of view
PostPosted: Tue Jun 10, 2014 6:41 am 
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detroittigers15 wrote:
I'm still just wondering if Gunner will make a good main character.

That's the reason this went on hiatus. The poll was inconclusive. I was consulting with the Dalai Lama on this very question. Needless to say even he couldn't answer my questions.

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 Post subject: Re: Scranton Stranglers Season Log: A players point of view
PostPosted: Sun Jun 15, 2014 8:21 pm 
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Favorite Japanese title: Don't Own
Scranton General Hospital

BRIAN: Yo, guys, get over here! Pablo's waking up!

Chris and Mark strolled over to the bed to find that Pablo was, in fact, waking up.

PABLO: w-what happened to me?

MARK: You were beaten pretty bad while trying to stop an armed robbery. You saved a lot of lives that day!

PABLO: Really?!

CHRIS: Nope. Remember when you tried to dive into your frozen pool cause you were jealous Brian could do it? Yeah, that caused some severe head trauma.

PABLO: Will I be able to play?

BRIAN: You better be. We need to give the Scrantonites a good sendoff. Postseason's starting up soon.

PABLO: What do you mean a good sendoff? What's happening??

BRIAN: Oh, right. You were asleep. But I never listen to anybody. Care to fill us in, Chris?

CHRIS: Yeah, Goldman's moving the team to Los Angeles.

BRIAN: Wait, what did you say? I wasn't listening.

Management Meeting

PEPPER: Look, William-

GOLDMAN: Please, Mr. Goldman.

PEPPER: *grumbles* Mr. Goldman... I just don't see why you're doing this.

GOLDMAN: Why don't you tell 'em, Tweety?

You may think that Goldman was using an affectionate name for a lover while impeded by a speech impediment just then, but no. William Goldman had bought a Parrot, named it Tweety, and made it his second in command.

TWEETY: *squawk* Because all the cool teams are doing it, sir.

Sittch was very jealous of Tweety as a Parrot was now his boss, more or less. He made his dislike of the parrot no secret.

SITTCH: If all the cool teams were jumping off a bridge would you do it?

TWEETY: *squawk* Of course I would. I can fly. Jumping off a bridge would not adversely affect me in any way.

JOEY: Sittch schooled by a bird again.

Joey was used to bird brains being his boss so he laughed off the whole situation.

PEPPER: Back to the topic at hand...I think the team should stay in Scranton. Moving to California hasn't been cool since the 1950's, there's way too many teams in California as is and there will be fewer riots if we stay.

Funny thing about Scranton is that the youth like to riot a lot. Scranton is a boring-ass town. Don't let anybody tell you different. In fact, there is a "no cruising" law which basically states you can't drive around a lot unless you're going somewhere. Kids, just drive around for fun. It's like loitering, but in a car. The only reason Chris Kennedy (the home town kid) didn't end up in the slammer and lead a life of crime for cruising is because of baseball. The point is, the youth in Scranton turn to rioting for fun and violent protests were breaking out ever since the moving announcement was made.

GOLDMAN: 1. The 1950's is cool again. Case in point: Grease. 2. There is a lot of room for everyone in California. It is one of the biggest states in the union after all and 3. Well, I dunno. Perhaps one of you fine gentleman can come up with an idea to help Scranton fans get behind the move.

SITTCH: We could replace all our Scranton merchandise with LA merchandise in the store for the rest of the season!

GOLDMAN: Weren't you supposed to be getting me coffee, Sittch?

TWEETY: *squawk* I have an idea! We could replace all our Scranton merchandise with LA merchandise for the rest of the season!

GOLDMAN: Great idea, dear boy!

SITTCH: Alright, screw this and screw you! There's something fishy about that parrot! Animals don't even have souls! I'm outta here!!!

Sittch stormed off and flipped the bird on his way out. He also gave everyone the middle finger.

TWEETY: *squawk* That was animal cruelty!

GOLDMAN: Don't worry Tweety, he'll come around. And so will everyone else Mwahahahahahaha!

The room went dark and there was a huge flash of lightning.

GOLDMAN: But anyway, the decision's been made. You can either come to Los Angeles with the team or stay here and coach little league ball. Your move, Peps.

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 Post subject: Re: Scranton Stranglers Season Log: A players point of view
PostPosted: Sun Jun 15, 2014 11:20 pm 
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Oh snap getting dramatic!!

Loved the flipped the bird line :lol:

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 Post subject: Re: Scranton Stranglers Season Log: A players point of view
PostPosted: Mon Jun 16, 2014 4:40 pm 
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BrewersFuzz wrote:
Oh snap getting dramatic!!

Loved the flipped the bird line :lol:

Thanks, pal! :D

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 Post subject: Re: Scranton Stranglers Season Log: A players point of view
PostPosted: Thu Jul 10, 2014 2:11 pm 
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Team Update

It's been a long time since you've heard about the Stranglers and seeing as how we're at the All-Star break just about, here's some important stats and stuff.

Power Surge: Three of the top five home run hitters in the National League are Stranglers. Those players are Chris Kennedy (25 HR) Ryan Howard (24 HR) and John Lennon (22 HR)

Attachment:
File comment: Ryan Howard, pictured hitting one of his world famous home runs for the Scranton Stranglers. (Note:this was not during a game, it was during a Subway commercial shoot.)
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Untitled.png [ 446.93 KiB | Viewed 2190 times ]




Career Year: Speaking of John Lennon, he's had the best year of his young career. He's batting a stellar .335 with the aforementioned 22 home runs and 65 RBI. He's finally been moved up in the batting order from 6th to 5th. Sgt. Pepper stated "I decided to switch John and Mick (Jagger) around in the order. Now we have three incredibly dangerous power hitters in the order right in a row and we still retain the pop at the end of the lineup."


Image
Quote:
Mick Jagger was not happy with being moved down in the batting order so here he is pictured not letting John Lennon sit at his table at a team dinner.




Missing Aces: While the offense is still par for the course this year, the pitching staff has certainly had a bit of trouble. Paul McCartney's ERA has skyrocketed this year from a career average of 2.85 to 4.32. Hopefully he can improve in the second half of the year. Meanwhile, the bullpen has been shaky as well. WildThing's age has been catching up to him. His velocity on his fastball has seemed to already have moved to LA. Though the chances of him finding it are slim to none. He is 1-5 on the year with a 4.77 ERA.


Still First Place: Despite any struggles faced this year, the Stranglers are still first place in the National League. But will the pitching staff be their demise? Or has the competition finally caught up? Quentin Crush is the ace rookie pitcher for the American League leading Chicago White Sox, a team that is not showing signs of slowing.


Scranton's All-Stars The Stranglers that made the all-star team this year are as follows: Ringo Starr, Ryan Howard, John Lennon, Chris Kennedy, Pablo Sanchez, Mick Jagger, and Brian Wilson. Congratulations to them. In an interesting turn of events, this year, the All-Star game will be hosted by the Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim which, as you may know, is in the vicinity of where the Stranglers will play next year.

Image

Name Controversy: The Scranton Stranglers have come under fire as of late for their team name. People have claimed that it is not right to "glorify a man who has killed numerous people with his bare hands." Surprisingly enough, it does not help matters that the fun mascot for the team (the Scranton Strangler) is very popular with kids. Owner William Goldman defends the name saying "We are not honoring this man in any way. We are making fun of him, really. Haven't any of you heard of satire? The Scranton Stranglers are a complete joke! Wait, don't print tha-" Well, there you have it folks, the Stranglers are a complete joke. Anyway, what do you folks think of this whole hubbub about the name?

Image
Quote:
Pictured: Man who has killed many people with his bare hands. Also voted 3rd best mascot in sports behind the Phillie Phanatic and the Phoenix Gorilla.


Scranton Stranglers at the All Star Break

Record: 54-30

Batting Average Leader: Ringo Starr (.378)

Home Run Leader: Chris Kennedy (25)

RBI Leader: Chris Kennedy (76)

Wins Leader: Yu Darvish (12)

ERA Leader: Charlie Brown (2.97)

Strikeouts Leader: Brian Jones (75)

Saves Leader: Brian Wilson (16)


Attachments:
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Untitled.png [ 446.93 KiB | Viewed 2190 times ]

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 Post subject: Re: Scranton Stranglers Season Log: A players point of view
PostPosted: Fri Jul 11, 2014 12:07 am 
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Hey I loved that Ryan Howard pic. :lol:

And both of my clients are All-Stars. :)

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 Post subject: Re: Scranton Stranglers Season Log: A players point of view
PostPosted: Fri Jul 11, 2014 5:28 pm 
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BrewersFuzz wrote:
Hey I loved that Ryan Howard pic. :lol:

And both of my clients are All-Stars. :)

Thanks I spent a lot of time on that pic.

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 Post subject: Re: Scranton Stranglers Season Log: A players point of view
PostPosted: Fri Jul 11, 2014 5:40 pm 
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Paul McCartney15 wrote:
BrewersFuzz wrote:
Hey I loved that Ryan Howard pic. :lol:

And both of my clients are All-Stars. :)

Thanks I spent a lot of time on that pic.


Please teach me how to become an expert at Microsoft Paint.

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I know I'm very late but I just looked at you log (the one in your sig) and noticed one of the teams are the Ham Bones. Nice name. I like it.


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 Post subject: Re: Scranton Stranglers Season Log: A players point of view
PostPosted: Sat Jul 12, 2014 3:20 pm 
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PowerPro Jr wrote:
Paul McCartney15 wrote:
BrewersFuzz wrote:
Hey I loved that Ryan Howard pic. :lol:

And both of my clients are All-Stars. :)

Thanks I spent a lot of time on that pic.


Please teach me how to become an expert at Microsoft Paint.


If only there were enough hours in the day to do such a thing, PPJ...

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 Post subject: Re: Scranton Stranglers Season Log: A players point of view
PostPosted: Sun Aug 03, 2014 6:57 pm 
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All-Star Update

Ringo Starr, Ryan Howard, John Lennon, Chris Kennedy, Pablo Sanchez, Mick Jagger, and Brian Wilson all arrived in Anaheim for the MLB All Star Game.

RYAN: Why don't we go check in and get some rest before tonight?

JOHN: Yeah, we gotta hit the town! Scout the area before we make the big move.

The Stranglers all went to the check in desk, but were dismayed to find that they all had to share a hotel room.

HOTEL WORKER: I'm terribly sorry for the inconvenience, but someone else reserved a whole floor. We had to make some adjustments.

RYAN: Who would reserve an entire floor?!

HOTEL WORKER: Albert Pujols says he was hosting a party for all the All Stars.

MICK: Wait, we're All Stars! Why weren't we invited??

Almost on que, Albert Pujols was carried in on his throne by Chris Carpenter.

ALBERT: Sorry boys, there must have been a mistake. Have fun with whatever you'll be doing tonight.

A bullriding machine was being delivered to the floor the party was being hosted.

PABLO: I've always wanted to ride one of those!

JOHN: I'm sure we can just rent one ourselves.

RYAN: What? No. Guys can we just stay in our hotel room for once?

BRIAN: No one's forcing you to come with us Ry-Ry.

RYAN: What would make you think that it would ever be okay to call me that? And it's gonna be really lame if I'm the only one who stays in the hotel.

CHRIS: Here's an idea. You could just pretend that we're staying in our rooms while we go get the bullriding machine.

RYAN: That would be a great idea, but I already know you guys aren't gonna be in the room. I can't just put that out of my head.

BRIAN: Well, dude, we can just knock you out and give you temporary amnesia or whatever.

MICK: And then we'll write you a note that we've decided to stay on the other side of the room and we aren't to be disturbed.

RYAN: That's actually a great idea! Here, take my bat!

The boys began beating up Ryan Howard in the hotel lobby. Obviously prominent professional baseball players beating one of their teammates up would give even the highest person pause. And it did just that.

GUY ON DRUGS: Man, what was in that shit? I can't keep living like this! CONCIERGE! Point me to the nearest rehab center!

Don't ever say that The Stranglers were bad people. They just turned that man's life around. Anyway, after they finished brutally beating their teammate, they were ready to roll.

PABLO: Let's get that bullriding machine!

TO BE CONTINUED....


I promise the next update won't take as long. My apologies again for the wait.

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 Post subject: Re: Scranton Stranglers Season Log: A players point of view
PostPosted: Sun Aug 03, 2014 7:01 pm 
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Lol don't worry it was worth it.

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 Post subject: Re: Scranton Stranglers Season Log: A players point of view
PostPosted: Sun Aug 03, 2014 7:29 pm 
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Paul McCartney15 wrote:
Almost on que

Almost on what? :P

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 Post subject: Re: Scranton Stranglers Season Log: A players point of view
PostPosted: Sun Aug 03, 2014 7:40 pm 
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ZeroGibson13 wrote:
Paul McCartney15 wrote:
Almost on que

Almost on what? :P

I see what tù did there

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